We were driving home from school this afternoon when God blessed me with a wonderful moment of ...validation, maybe? I don't know the right word at the moment so that will have to do. Anyway, Ivan, cousin C and I are slipping down the road towards home. The two of them are always very chatty after carpool and usually it is nothing worth hearing, so I tune them out. Today however, was different.
C says "W was the first child out of mommy's tummy and then you came out of your mommy's tummy..." Ivan immediately interrupts her with "No. That is not right. " C says "Yes, it is. W, then you and then me." Ivan says again "No. I did not come out of my mommy's tummy. I came from another ladies tummy and then my mom and dad came and adopted me. The other lady is still in Kazakhstan. Punch buggy green! No punch backs!!"
I don't know why this touched me so much, but it did. J and I refer to her as his birth-mother not "the other lady". He is 6 though and was trying to get his point across before he was interrupted, so I let it go. It was validating perhaps because it shows me that he sees us as mom and dad not his "adopted mom and dad" and that he has absorbed at least some of what we have tried to share with him over the years about his "history". I wanted to record this so that when he is a nasty teenager and possibly throws that one out I can be reminded that at his core and in his heart we are just mommy and daddy.
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