Trust...

Ivan and I were outside the other day enjoying the cooler weather here in NC. He was walking up and down the driveway and examining every leaf he could find. Then he was showing them to me as if they were gold. It was wonderful. After a while of staying on the concrete Ivan decided that it was time to venture out into the yard. He took one tentative step onto the uneven surface and then turned around to look at me. I put my hand out and he immediately grabbed it and took off. I would not let him fall on this new terrain and he knew it. It was at that moment that it hit me...Ivan trusts me completely.

What a wonderful and terrifying feeling for a (relatively) new Mom. This little guy trusts me to make everything safe for him. He doesn't ever doubt that Mom will always save the day and make everything all better.

I just wish that it were true. I wish that I would always be able to make everything safe for him. That's part of letting him grow up though. I will have to let him walk on the new terrain all by himself one day. I know that day will come way too fast for me and never quite fast enough for Ivan.

Damn, I love this kid so much!