Where's my annual review?

There has been a question plaguing me recently. Am I doing a good job at being a parent? When your child is only two and half it can be hard to tell how you are doing at this mission called parenting. I mean if he were twenty-five I might have a clue about how I did, but then again maybe not.

My parents have a saying "You do the best you can for your kids, but in the end you can neither take too much of the credit or the blame for who they turn out to be." I'm sure that when Ivan is all grown-up and out of the house I will also be able to subscribe to this philosophy...but not right now. Now I am responsible for teaching this little wonder what is right and what is wrong, what is nice and what is thoughtless, what is good and what is evil. There are so many lessons that J and I are responsible for teaching Ivan, I can't be so laid back about it!

When I was working outside of the home there were assessments of my job performance periodically. However in parenthood there are no such assessments given. We are given the task of raising these little people into thoughtful, productive adults and no one ever lets us know how we are doing. That seems crazy to me!

I am not looking for kudos or anything like that...just a little honest feedback about what I am doing right, what I need to improve upon, what I need to keep my eye on for the future.

Ivan is a happy kid. He is growing like crazy and he is smart as a whip. He notices everything - to the point where I wonder if we will ever be able to surprise him with anything! He sings, dances and laughs every day. He loves to make us laugh and he smiles all the time.

Hmmm...Reading that makes me feel like J and I are doing something right here. I know that as Ivan grows, the "markers" of success will change and I will just have to continue to look for them and to have faith that God will show them to me. I must have faith that God is leading me and my parenting and that Ivan will be Ivan, whoever that may turn out to be.

Tomorrow and Tomorrow and Tomorrow...

Tomorrow we have our first Kindermusik class. I signed Ivan and I up for the class back in August with an anticipated September start date. Unfortunately, due to construction delays our start date has been postponed several times.

Ivan and I participated in two Gymboree classes last year and really enjoyed them. However, Ivan really loves music, so we thought that we would give this new curriculum a try.

As always, I am a little apprehensive about meeting new people and starting the class. Ivan and I are both really shy until we get warmed up to a new group. Since I know that Ivan will be shy, I will have to come out of my shell quickly to ensure that we meet knew people and get all that we can out of our class time.

I know that we will enjoy our class. Once we get into it everything will be fine. Until then though...ugh.