Bah Bah Woes

Ivan was weaned from a pacifier at 12 months at the orphanage. Due to the number of children in each group the caregiver's need for the children to be as self-sufficient as possible as early as possible. The kids are weaned from the bottle and the pacifier at 12 months, no exceptions.

Well, J and I knew that we had a twenty hour plane ride ahead of us with Ivan, and that we ALL needed him to have a pacifier (also known as a bah bah in our house). So, after a couple of days with J "reminding" Ivan how to use the bah bah, he was hooked once again. It was wonderful on the plane accept the one time we lost one and all of the lights were out. Ivan screamed at the top of his lungs until I could pull the spare from the diaper bag that was buried under the seat in front of me. Once it was in his mouth, all was right with the world and he drifted off to sleep once more. In fact, Ivan slept almost the entire way home, including the 7 hour layover in Frankfurt. It was a total blessing.

Ivan is still using the bah bah at naptime and bedtime, which is just fine with his Mom and Dad, with one exception. When he loses it in the middle of the night, he stands up in his crib and screams until someone (read Mom) gets one back into his mouth. Other than that, he sleeps like an angel.

For the past several nights J and I have been putting multiple bah bah's in Ivan's crib and making a point to show him where they are located before we leave the room. It has not done one bit of good so far. Last night I put all four bah's into the crib with him and tried to get him to put one in his mouth, instead of me doing it for him before he got into the bed. I know that he knows how to do it, he does it in the car all the time. He would have none of it. I went back in several times and even put one in his hand. No good. He worked himself into such a state that after an hour of wrestling with it, I went in and put the dang bah bah in and sat on the floor until he finally drifted off to sleep.

When we were in Almaty waiting for our Embassy appointment, J was watching him sleep one evening and saw him lose and find the bah bah. This problem only started after we got home. At first I thought that he was waking due to the new environment etc while he was sleeping. However, as time passed and I did more reading and paid closer attention to what was going on at 1, 3 and 5 AM when I was in the room with him, I noticed that once that the bah bah was back in his mouth, he was fine and went right back to sleep.

I've asked several experienced Mom's about this issue and almost all of them laugh and say oh yes, I remember that. Most just had multiple bah bah's in the crib, some even used the little clips, so that the bah bah was always attached to their little one. However, after last nights drama, that doesn't solve what seems to be our problem. Based on last night (and yes I know that one night does not tell the whole tale) Ivan is refusing to take the bah bah himself, when it is time to sleep.

I know that it is selfish to want to solve this problem because I am tired of getting up at 1, 3 and 5 in the morning almost every day. However, I am always willing to get up when there is a dirty diaper, or a bad dream, or some such involved. Unfortunately, getting up because he can't or won't find his own bah bah is just making me cranky.